Category Archives: Home

Nov 29 2012
7 Comments
Family, Health, Home, Life, Teaching, Writing

Becoming vs. Being

This evening after work, I sat on my kitchen counter and ate cranberry bread. It’s one of my bad habits. The counter, not the bread. While I ate my snack like a small child, two things caught my attention.

First, this note on my fridge. I wrote it a month or so ago in one of my more frustrated moments. Today, it made me realize that I am always trying to become something else. First I was a college kid wanting to become an adult, then an analyst hoping to become a teacher, and now a teacher wishing to become a novelist. It hit me, when I am I ever just going to be?

That’s when my eyes were drawn to my bookshelf that is messily filled with too many things. All those eclectic books and pictures are my life. Each title and each smiling face a different part of me. Another metaphor staring me in the face. A life that is already enough if I stop to pay attention.

Maybe bookshelves are the real windows to the soul…

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to stop working toward that goal on the fridge, but I also need to recognize that even if I already were a full-time novelist, there would always be something else to become. If we don’t stop to be, life will pass us by…

Lately I have slowed things down, which means a more gradual approach to this becoming business. In some ways, this is hard because it feels like I am accomplishing a lot less. In others, it is allowing me to be the more balanced person I have already worked so hard to become.

Are you good at being? Tonight I am collecting secrets.

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Nov 24 2012
11 Comments
Health, Home, Life, Pets

Yoga Cat & Other Obstacles

Despite my best intentions, life has felt challenging lately. Even home yoga. I would like to introduce you to yoga cat. She is nothing like yoga dog, who stops by, stretches, wags his tail, and then moves on. Yoga cat likes to be in the way, the entire time. Every day since I decided to take my home yoga practice more seriously, she has been on my mat from start to finish. I have done locust poses at odd angles, tree balanced precariously over an outstretched cat, warrior with my hand a dangling invitation for her to take a good swat, and seated meditation with a purring ball of fur pressed against my legs.

Like many obstacles, she is part joyous distraction, part menace.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Why not just move her? But, that’s the thing. First, she’s not an easy creature to move. My husband and I joke that she’s half ferrel. She does what she pleases unless you’re willing to risk an altercation. Second, I have tried to view her as an added challenge to clearing my mind and focusing inward. If I work hard enough, I can tune her out, even if every once in awhile I receive an unexpected slap of her paw or have to move some of my poses to the carpet.

Luna is perfectly in the way.

I actually think yoga cat is a good metaphor for life. Anything worth doing is going to have obstacles. You can either put in the work anyway or switch your attention elsewhere. I am pretty sure if I pulled out a different mat she would just follow me to a new location. I have to remind myself this as I push through obstacles in other parts of my life. Even if I switched directions, there would be something else. Thankfully, meditation, yoga, blogging, reading all help. And, doing yoga over a cat might just be part of the fun.

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Nov 23 2012
4 Comments
Family, Health, Home, Life

GMOs are everywhere, do you care?

In some ways, I’m sure my blog screams hippie. However, there are a lot of influences on me and I, like you, am a lot of things. I begin this way because I want you to give what I am saying a chance, no matter what your background.

Recently, I watched the film Genetic Roulette about the possible effects of GMOs on our bodies. Like any good skeptic, I am not willing to attribute every health problem we face to the increased GMOs in our diet, even if both rise side-by-side on a graph. Likewise, I have seen plenty of indie documentaries that have not convinced me of anything. However, there are points in this film that intuitively ring true, such as the idea that we should not be eating plants engineered to kill bugs, whose seeds cannot be handled without gloves, or that cause serious health issues in animals.

If you have the opportunity to watch the film or research GMOs on your own, I encourage you to do so. I was admittedly resistant to learning about GMOs because I figured I ate well enough already, but I have changed my tune. I share because I care.

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Nov 22 2012
4 Comments
Dogs, Family, Home, Life

Thankfulness Thursday: Thanksgiving

On this, the final Thankfulness Thursday, I decided to share my gratitude for the very day of Thanksgiving itself. While my mother’s family honors our Native American heritage, we do not boycott the day. Instead, we make it our own, embracing the positive aspects of giving thanks and coming together as a family to enjoy a meal and honor abundance. We celebrated on Tuesday, sharing a feast of GMO-free, organic food in Mt. Shasta, toasting Bodhichitta and watching the rain fall all day on a blanket of orange leaves.

Today I am grateful for two Thanksgivings, one in Mt. Shasta, one in Sacramento. Two families that are really one because they are both mine. Food, laughter, love. I am grateful. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

A happy, rainy Thanksgiving.

Full of many reminders for love and peace…

As well as the obligatory post-Turkey hangover.

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Nov 15 2012
15 Comments
Family, Health, Home, Life, Teaching, Travel, Writing

Thankfulness Thursday: Abundance

It’s pretty easy by Thursday evening to feel more than drained. A bit of gratitude goes a long way. This week, I’m grateful for abundance. Another blogger recently wrote about how we must acknowledge the abundance in our lives in order to create more… And, I have to admit, it is pretty humbling to stop and realize how much abundance most of us already have.

Tuesday, when I was home sick, I spent the better part of the morning digging through the past year of pictures to decide what to put on our holiday card, (yes, even when I’m sick I feel the need to cross something off my to-do list). As the last 12 months rolled by, I was struck by how even during years of fiscal conservatism my life is full of so many fortunate, happy moments.

Sure it would be nice to have that money to fly to Sweden to visit my cousin or to feel more economically secure or to… The list goes on, but really none of those things would change the fact that my life is already full. I worried that giving up a third of my income to become a teacher would create a life that felt less abundant, but that could not be further from the case. I now have more time to enjoy abundance as well as a completely different definition of the word.

Tonight I am grateful for the abundance in my life: my family, friends, dog, cat, house, job, coworkers, students, food, yoga, travel, writing, love… My life is incredibly full, especially when I take the time to stop and look. If you haven’t flipped through your 2012 pictures lately, you should. Talk about life compressed into a few captured moments. Abundance, abundance, abundance.

I’ll leave you with a few of my favorite moments from this year. It was hard to pick.

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Nov 11 2012
1 Comment
Home, Life

Sunday Song: Home

Home can be anywhere. Mine is here. Yours is there. This morning I drove through the streets of Midtown Sacramento, early for an appointment. The leaves were the perfect palette of fall colors. The sun was bright. The buildings were more interesting than usual, the repurposed industrial decay alive amidst old victorian townhouses.

Last night we ate with friends in this little Korean restaurant hidden in a rundown strip mall. I expected it to be just that, a family-owned place that looked like every other. Instead, it was a portal to a different world. Inside, K-Pop played on flat screen TVs, wood paneling was decorated with graffiti, and posters promised alcoholic adventures with famous Korean singers. It was both trendy and comfortable, a delicate balance. The waiter gave us all kinds of free dishes and drinks I had never tried before. Somehow we were no longer in a suburb of Sacramento but instead in some transnational alternate universe.

Lately, I’m feeling more at home in my hometown than I have in a very long time. I’m discovering there is plenty of character if I look hard enough. Happy Sunday, happy home day.

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Nov 08 2012
4 Comments
Dogs, Family, Health, Home, Life, Pets, Teaching, Writing

Thankfulness Thursday: Three Posts Left…

Three weeks left, so three thankfulness moments:

Each morning this week I’ve awakened a half hour before I need to get out of bed, giving me time to appreciate my snuggling dog and husband. More often than not, I’ve been the middle spoon. Tuesday I lay awake and realized there was nowhere else on earth I would rather be. No where. Sharing one pillow with a dog and a spouse may not seem like heaven to many, but it is to me. Now if only the alarm didn’t have to go off at 6AM…

So grateful for these two guys!

A student in my class wrote me a letter today. She asked me to please talk to her in the same voice she used with me, calm and quiet. Unfortunately, she was caught in the crossfires of some stern words to another student. I did not yell, but I was short with her. Her little note humbled me. Instead of feeling bad I just felt like she was right. I apologized and kept the reminder with me all day. The same student is working on casting a kindness spell on our classroom. Maybe it already worked on me. As long as she keeps her spells positive, I am grateful…

Waiting on my doorstep this evening was a box full of herbal tinctures, vitamins, and teas. I’m on an experimental quest. I’ll spare you the gritty details. Most of us have one medical challenge or another (or maybe multiple). I feel fortunate mine is minor compared to many. However, doctors cannot fix it. Pain killers have been my only option. Recently, I discovered a different path. I’m seeing a woman who combines physical and mental healing with massage and home treatments. Might sound a bit hippie to some, but I feel empowered. Might just transform into a full-on hippie yet. Gratitude, gratitude, gratitude…

Today was challenging but writing all that made me feel better. Maybe you should give Thankfulness Thursday a shot too. Only two weeks/three posts until Thanksgiving!

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Don’t forget! Thankfulness Thursday linkup at Domestic Fashionista. It’s funny, I almost wrote about watching some of my students battle writer’s block as we’ve started NaNoWriMo in my classroom. Turns out Ashley over at Domestic Fashionista already had this topic covered for the week! Great minds…

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Oct 25 2012
14 Comments
Family, Home, Life, Teaching, Writing

Thankfulness Thursday: Who do you choose to be?

Part of whatever it is that is happening right now is that I’m learning to be me. We live in an age of extended adolescence. In my case, adulthood is starting at age 29. And, I don’t mean this in a time to buy a minivan kind of way, (no offense to the lovely twenty-something minivan drivers in my life). Instead, I mean this as I’m finally starting to figure out who the heck I am.

I’m a teacher, a wife, a daughter, a friend, a writer, an occasional traveler. I’m each of these things because I choose to be, not because I think I should or always will be, (although I hope to be most of these things all my life). I am incredibly grateful to be in the exact place I am right now, even though it is hard and even though I want some things to change. I think that’s the big difference. I used to fight life, to fight all the parts that were hard or not perfect.

Now I see it as part of a general movement in the right direction. I look back five years, things are better despite the bumps along the way. I am optimistic the same trend will continue with faith and a lot of hard work. I’ve got the hard work part down, so really it’s just a matter of maintaining a positive outlook and enjoying the journey, bumps and all.

So, what does it mean to be me today?

It means I write what vibrates in my bones, popular or not. It means mermaids for NaNoWriMo, even if practically every agent on the planet currently claims to hate mermaids. It means yoga in my living room and a make-shift altar on my coffee table. It means Sunday night dinners with my family, coffee dates in sundresses with my best friends, Wednesday nights in my pajamas watching TV with my husband. It means teaching in a way that leaves my heart aching.

I am part hippie, part hipster, part bohemian, part yuppie, part vegetarian-in-training.

As silly as it sounds, today I’m grateful to be me because it took me a very long time to get what that means, even if who I am is still an evolving mess of ideals and dreams. Maybe I’ll always be this way, but that’s alright, I’m starting to get that the labels and the knowing and the destinations aren’t the point.

***

Link up for Thankfulness Thursday @ Domestic Fashionista.

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Oct 12 2012
10 Comments
Health, Home, Life, Teaching, Writing

Seeking Balance: Teaching, Writing, Life

Inspired by two other bloggers this week, I want to share two days in the life of me, a fifth grade teacher, writer, human being. I know some teachers work far more hours than I do, but this does not mean the 9-10 hours I spend each day are not intensely full, (or that some days/weekends do not include more work). However, I have found that cutting myself off is important to maintaining the energy necessary to teach each day. Likewise, I think we need to move away from a culture where everything is a contest of who worked the most. Life is about balance. Here is my attempt:

Writing Tuesdays:

6:00 AM Wake-up

6:50 AM Leave for work

7:00 AM Arrive in my classroom, set-up for the day, get through as much on my to-do list as possible

7:55 AM Report to duty outside as the students arrive

8:15 AM Students in the classroom, day begins, all my energy goes to teaching lessons, answering questions, meeting small groups.

3:15 PM Students leave, Tuesday I have no prep and I usually spend my lunches multi-tasking by making copies, working out problems with students, and building relationships, so 3:15 is my first “break.” However, I don’t really take a break because my goal is to get home. I use this time to prep for the next day, make parent phone calls, etc.

4:00 PM My teaching coach arrives, we figure out what still needs to be done to clear my credential and talk through any challenges I’m having in the classroom.

5:00 PM Arrive home, walk the dog, clean-up a bit, eat a snack, relax.

5:30 PM Start writing. Tuesdays Alex and I do our own thing, this is my time to focus.

8:00 PM Make dinner/eat (We eat late…), get prepared for the next day, read, unwind.

10:00 PM Sleep

Unwired Wednesdays:

6AM-12:45 PM Same as Tuesday

12:45 PM Students go home, Wednesdays are our prep and professional development days

1:00 PM Meet my team to plan instructional overview for the following two weeks

2:00 PM Professional development with school staff on anything from data analysis to teaching reading more effectively in small groups

3:00 PM Personal planning time to get ready for Thursday/following week

4:00 PM I leave a little earlier than the rest of the week. This gives me something to anticipate, (even if I have to leave items on my to-do list). I get home, check my personal email, clean-up a bit, then head off to hot yoga.

5:45 PM Hot yoga

7:00 PM Get home, shower, prepare for Thursday, make dinner

8:00 PM Eat dinner, hang out with Alex, watch TV (Daily Show, Downton Abbey, New Girl)… We aren’t big TV watchers, but I do find it relaxing on Wednesday nights.

10:00 PM Sleep!

Unwired Wednesdays means no computer usage after 5PM. I find this break amazingly rejuvenating, especially midweek. Wasting time on the computer was a drain on my happiness, even though blogging and writing were beneficial to my overall well-being. Accordingly, I had to consciously create balance in the middle of each week.

I hope you’ll consider using this as inspiration for a post yourself. I won’t lie, I really like peeking into the lives of others as it gives me ideas on how I can better use my own time. And, if nothing else, it is a great opportunity to look at your life and evaluate how your time is spent– how do you seek balance between health, work, family/friends and your other interests?

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Oct 01 2012
9 Comments
Dogs, Health, Home, Life, Pets

Yoga Dog Monday: Looking for Converts

Monday nights are usually hot yoga night for me, my chance to unwind, get a little exercise, and leave feeling like a new person. Anyone who knows me in real life knows I’m a big yoga advocate. It majorly relieves my stress/anxiety, numbs my chronic neck pain, and keeps my pathetic left knee functioning.

A couple weeks without yoga and I’m a mess, a realization that has driven me to practice at home when I can’t get myself out the door to class… Like, uhh, tonight. In all seriousness, it has taken years for me to develop the patience and discipline to do yoga at home without giving up after five minutes, but it’s finally starting to pay off as I focus on poses I need most instead of being at the whim of an instructor.

And, the unexpected side benefit– more time with yoga dog! When I do yoga around the house, I am attacked by Simon. Without fail, the mat comes out, he starts stretching, then he ends up trying to lick my face while I’m meditating on the floor. I’ve been attempting to capture yoga dog in action for days. Unfortunately, the camera comes out and he runs away, (yoga dog is one cheeky monkey!).

Simon is a bit camera shy about his yoga moves…

But, I finally caught him in his favorite pose, downward dog.

Anyway, back to the point of all this– I believe there is a yoga style for everyone, whether it be hot yoga or Vinyasa or what have you. Heck, as my conservative, P90X-doing hot yoga buddy said the other night, “You don’t even have to be a hippie!” So get out there, try it if you haven’t and try it again if you have! It took me years to find the right style/instructors to keep me hooked, but now I’m going on two years of consistent yoga-ing and couldn’t be more pleased!

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Sep 30 2012
13 Comments
Home, Life, Travel

Come on, Come on, Get Happy!

Late yesterday evening, for reasons I’ll spare you, I was in a funk. Complicated by a complete inability to fall asleep, I found myself on the couch, alone, at 12:45 AM, looking for something to stream on Netflix until I was tired enough to sleep. At first, I was thinking romantic comedy, something to take the edge off my earlier decision to read a book about human trafficking, and then I stumbled across this wonderful little gem:

I clicked thinking, alright, this is probably going to be cheesy or annoying, especially since I’m grumpy, but it was actually amazingly uplifting, following the science of happiness and positive psychology around the world. Multiple times throughout the film I actually caught myself smiling and laughing at the pure displays of happiness expressed by people from different cultures, which included everything from runners in gorilla suits in San Francisco to dancing 100-year-old women in Japan.

Best of all, I went to sleep happy. The film explains how 40% of our happiness is completely within our control and not dependent on external triggers like wealth or status. Heck, if a poor family living in what I would consider to be squalor in India can be happy, then I can too. It also reminded me that I am happy most of the time and that when I’m not, it’s within my power to change my mood through exercise, novel activities, relationships with friends and family, and helping others.

Long story short, watch this film. It made me want to move to Denmark, or at least live differently. I highly recommend it.

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Sep 17 2012
4 Comments
Dogs, Home, Life, Pets

Playing Possum

Let me tell you a little story about the wonderful wild kingdom that is my backyard in Sacramento, California.

Last night, we arrived home after dark, my dog Simon shooting straight through the back door to bark at something in the yard. Given the after dark status, we immediately started calling, “Treat, treat,” his usual cue back into the house. No luck.

Oh no, I thought, please, please don’t be another skunk. See, he always comes for a treat, unless there is something better than a treat to chase in the backyard.

Thankfully, my husband was on call to go after him, returning moments later with an unusual claim.

“Luna killed a possum.”

No way, I thought, our cat is not tough enough to kill a possum.

“Okay, better get out that man card and get to work,” I replied. Selective sexism at its best. I refuse to touch dead or half dead animals, much to Alex’s chagrin.

Moments later, Alex returns.

“Hey, umm, have you ever heard of that expression ‘playing possum’?”

“No.”

My husband then explained to me that possums are known for playing dead. Sure, I thought, wishful thinking, you just don’t want to shovel such a big, nasty creature into the trash.

“Give it some time, I guess,” I replied, doubtful.

Now curious, I peered out the back window, flashlight in hand, hopeful not to see some sort of disgusting dead possum or, worse, two creepy little eyes staring back at me. Alex did warn me its eyes were stuck open.

Instead, nothing.

The possum was gone. Apparently, playing possum is a real thing, not just something my husband made up as not to have to dispose of another carcass brought to our doorstep by Luna. Good thing Alex didn’t try to lift the poor creature into the trash. That would have been a very unpleasant surprise…

Moral of the story, if you see a lifeless possum, give it some time. Like at least fifteen to twenty minutes. You may not have to deal with it after all.

Was pretty sure this ferocious beast was not responsible for a possum death…

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