Tag Archives: Happiness

Seeking Balance: Teaching, Writing, Life

Inspired by two other bloggers this week, I want to share two days in the life of me, a fifth grade teacher, writer, human being. I know some teachers work far more hours than I do, but this does not mean the 9-10 hours I spend each day are not intensely full, (or that some days/weekends do not include more work). However, I have found that cutting myself off is important to maintaining the energy necessary to teach each day. Likewise, I think we need to move away from a culture where everything is a contest of who worked the most. Life is about balance. Here is my attempt:

Writing Tuesdays:

6:00 AM Wake-up

6:50 AM Leave for work

7:00 AM Arrive in my classroom, set-up for the day, get through as much on my to-do list as possible

7:55 AM Report to duty outside as the students arrive

8:15 AM Students in the classroom, day begins, all my energy goes to teaching lessons, answering questions, meeting small groups.

3:15 PM Students leave, Tuesday I have no prep and I usually spend my lunches multi-tasking by making copies, working out problems with students, and building relationships, so 3:15 is my first “break.” However, I don’t really take a break because my goal is to get home. I use this time to prep for the next day, make parent phone calls, etc.

4:00 PM My teaching coach arrives, we figure out what still needs to be done to clear my credential and talk through any challenges I’m having in the classroom.

5:00 PM Arrive home, walk the dog, clean-up a bit, eat a snack, relax.

5:30 PM Start writing. Tuesdays Alex and I do our own thing, this is my time to focus.

8:00 PM Make dinner/eat (We eat late…), get prepared for the next day, read, unwind.

10:00 PM Sleep

Unwired Wednesdays:

6AM-12:45 PM Same as Tuesday

12:45 PM Students go home, Wednesdays are our prep and professional development days

1:00 PM Meet my team to plan instructional overview for the following two weeks

2:00 PM Professional development with school staff on anything from data analysis to teaching reading more effectively in small groups

3:00 PM Personal planning time to get ready for Thursday/following week

4:00 PM I leave a little earlier than the rest of the week. This gives me something to anticipate, (even if I have to leave items on my to-do list). I get home, check my personal email, clean-up a bit, then head off to hot yoga.

5:45 PM Hot yoga

7:00 PM Get home, shower, prepare for Thursday, make dinner

8:00 PM Eat dinner, hang out with Alex, watch TV (Daily Show, Downton Abbey, New Girl)… We aren’t big TV watchers, but I do find it relaxing on Wednesday nights.

10:00 PM Sleep!

Unwired Wednesdays means no computer usage after 5PM. I find this break amazingly rejuvenating, especially midweek. Wasting time on the computer was a drain on my happiness, even though blogging and writing were beneficial to my overall well-being. Accordingly, I had to consciously create balance in the middle of each week.

I hope you’ll consider using this as inspiration for a post yourself. I won’t lie, I really like peeking into the lives of others as it gives me ideas on how I can better use my own time. And, if nothing else, it is a great opportunity to look at your life and evaluate how your time is spent– how do you seek balance between health, work, family/friends and your other interests?

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Sunday Song: Slow it Down

Standing in the middle of a sea of people, I closed my eyes and tried to make everything stand still around me. Large crowds and too much noise overwhelm my senses. However, when the Lumineers took the stage, I was able to shut off everything else and just absorb the music.

This song was one that followed me home, the words etched into my brain. A perfect Sunday song, with a message I really need. Slow it Down. My goal every Sunday. Should be my goal other days as well, but Sundays are a good place to start.

Hope you find a way to slow it down today as well.

Happy Sunday.

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Thankfulness Thursday: BE BRAVE.

Today is the second installment of Thankfulness Thursday. This week’s theme, be brave.

1. Eight happy little query letters left my computer today as I fought back some serious stage fright. It took courage to press send each time, but I did it! I’m sending them out in batches of eight because eight is my lucky number… 8/8/83, born. 8/8/08, engaged… Big sigh of grateful relief that I got this far.

2. Speaking of engaged, yesterday was my three year wedding anniversary. Today I’m grateful to all the incredible people who made it the happiest day of my life. My family, Alex, and my friends, THANK YOU! It’s funny to admit, I actually had to push myself to be brave to let this day happen. My inclination was to run away and get married with a tiny audience, but I’m so glad we didn’t. I realized in the process that involving others wasn’t about putting on a show, but instead about creating a community of love and support from the people with which we’re grateful to share our lives. Incredibly and humbly thankful for this day and everyone we love.

Three years ago!

Three years later! (Still smiling!)

A big thank you to my glorious family.

And to our glorious friends!

3. One of the bravest people I have ever met is 10. This week, she brought in the Black Eyed Peas track “Where is the Love?” Before playing it for us, she gave the class a little speech about how she chose it because she felt her classmates needed to reflect on how they treat one another at school. She then demanded that students sing along with her and would not stand for any laughter or horseplay. She is my hero this week. I wish I could tell you her whole life story. If you’re anything like me, you’d cry with amazement.

4. Sometimes I try things when I teach that require me to be brave, like taking 30 fifth graders outside to attempt a human model of our solar system. Watching the students laugh as they unsuccessfully tried to orbit the student in the middle (playing the sun) reminded me why I teach. So thankful for that happy little reminder. We’ll try again when it’s not 100 degrees outside…

Studying the planets and creating our own maps of the solar system has been a highlight of our fifth grade year so far.

There you have it. Four things for which I am grateful on this fourth day of October. Thanks again to the lovely Ashley over at Domestic Fashionista for the inspiration and graphic! Wishing you a brave and thankful Thursday.

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Five Reasons that Hip, Happy and Healthy People Do Yoga!

In the spirit of unwired Wednesdays and stepping away from my computer to promote better mental and physical health, I bring you my first guest blogger. Be sure to show Carolyn Fallon some love and check out her blog too!:

Despite that fact that yoga is incredibly hip in modern culture, the ancient practice has many benefits for health and happiness. Although it is promoted as a panacea for optimal well-being, yoga is still a mystery to many people. For those who have never stepped onto a mat or into a classroom, a brief background is in order.

According to the National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine (NCCAM) in Bethesda, Maryland, yoga is a mind-body discipline that originated in ancient India. Comprised of gentle meditative movements, yoga is basically safe and effective for everyone. There are yoga classes for seniors, children, athletes and even pregnant women.

Yoga combines various physical poses and breathing exercises with meditation and a distinct Eastern philosophy. Many Americans who use it for health reasons practice Hatha yoga, which includes many different styles. With guidance from a trained yoga instructor, the exercise offers huge benefits with very few side effects.

Why should Americans include yoga as part of their regular workouts? Even in this new century, the ancient practice offers many desirable benefits. Here are five reasons that hip, happy and healthy people practice yoga.

1. Inner Peace

Yoga promotes contentment and inner peace. While athletes, overachievers and Type A personalities may not immediately grasp this significance, peace and contentment are fundamental to their tasks. All yoga, no matter the intensity, promotes relaxation and calmness. People who are at peace with themselves are happier, healthier individuals.

2. Flexibility and Strength

People who practice yoga for many weeks or months enjoy stronger, more flexible bodies from morning to night. Through gentle stretches and focused poses, yoga works the muscles, tissues and bones. It improves core body strength and enables flexible movements. Orthopedic surgeon Dr. Glen Axelrod states, “Yoga is excellent for strengthening both flexibility and balance.”

3. Healthy Appearance

Men and women who practice yoga are healthier, more attractive people. Their healthy, fit appearance is the result of yoga’s physical and psychological benefits. People who practice yoga on a regular basis cannot help but look toned and sculpted, and this helps them feel better about themselves too.

4. Body Awareness

People who practice yoga have a keen sense of their bodies and how the body works. Yoga increases the respect they have for their bodies. As a result, they are less likely to overeat and more likely to get adequate rest. Additionally, yoga heightens sexual pleasure.

5. More Compassion

Yoga promotes compassion for others by encouraging people to look at the big picture. In fact, the University of Maryland Center for Integrative Medicine trains yoga instructors in many healing areas, including compassion. When people learn to take care of themselves, they have more energy to give to others. Hip, happy and healthy people are usually more compassionate, kind and generous.

Carolyn Fallon is a 20-something year old with a passion for life, fitness and overall well being. She is an avid spinner, healthy cooking enthusiast and lover of life. Check out Carolyn’s blog at http://fullonfit.blogspot.com

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Yoga Dog Monday: Looking for Converts

Monday nights are usually hot yoga night for me, my chance to unwind, get a little exercise, and leave feeling like a new person. Anyone who knows me in real life knows I’m a big yoga advocate. It majorly relieves my stress/anxiety, numbs my chronic neck pain, and keeps my pathetic left knee functioning.

A couple weeks without yoga and I’m a mess, a realization that has driven me to practice at home when I can’t get myself out the door to class… Like, uhh, tonight. In all seriousness, it has taken years for me to develop the patience and discipline to do yoga at home without giving up after five minutes, but it’s finally starting to pay off as I focus on poses I need most instead of being at the whim of an instructor.

And, the unexpected side benefit– more time with yoga dog! When I do yoga around the house, I am attacked by Simon. Without fail, the mat comes out, he starts stretching, then he ends up trying to lick my face while I’m meditating on the floor. I’ve been attempting to capture yoga dog in action for days. Unfortunately, the camera comes out and he runs away, (yoga dog is one cheeky monkey!).

Simon is a bit camera shy about his yoga moves…

But, I finally caught him in his favorite pose, downward dog.

Anyway, back to the point of all this– I believe there is a yoga style for everyone, whether it be hot yoga or Vinyasa or what have you. Heck, as my conservative, P90X-doing hot yoga buddy said the other night, “You don’t even have to be a hippie!” So get out there, try it if you haven’t and try it again if you have! It took me years to find the right style/instructors to keep me hooked, but now I’m going on two years of consistent yoga-ing and couldn’t be more pleased!

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Come on, Come on, Get Happy!

Late yesterday evening, for reasons I’ll spare you, I was in a funk. Complicated by a complete inability to fall asleep, I found myself on the couch, alone, at 12:45 AM, looking for something to stream on Netflix until I was tired enough to sleep. At first, I was thinking romantic comedy, something to take the edge off my earlier decision to read a book about human trafficking, and then I stumbled across this wonderful little gem:

I clicked thinking, alright, this is probably going to be cheesy or annoying, especially since I’m grumpy, but it was actually amazingly uplifting, following the science of happiness and positive psychology around the world. Multiple times throughout the film I actually caught myself smiling and laughing at the pure displays of happiness expressed by people from different cultures, which included everything from runners in gorilla suits in San Francisco to dancing 100-year-old women in Japan.

Best of all, I went to sleep happy. The film explains how 40% of our happiness is completely within our control and not dependent on external triggers like wealth or status. Heck, if a poor family living in what I would consider to be squalor in India can be happy, then I can too. It also reminded me that I am happy most of the time and that when I’m not, it’s within my power to change my mood through exercise, novel activities, relationships with friends and family, and helping others.

Long story short, watch this film. It made me want to move to Denmark, or at least live differently. I highly recommend it.

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At Least I’m Good At Cheering Myself Up…

Today a student brought me a note. At first, I barely looked at it, distracted in my attempt to convince the class that listening to the sounds of the ocean while writing is beneficial. Most of my students have never been to the beach, so when our peaceful CD started playing and they looked at me funny, I told them to imagine they were writing in front of the sea. Again, strange looks, until I said I was imagining myself there right then, the sun shining, the waves crashing, with a big old smile on my face. That time, they smiled back and nodded, finally getting the picture.

Then, I remembered to look at the note and realized it was a list of all the things the student likes about me, (much more interesting than the complaints I was expecting to read). See, when she was really upset with me last week, an administrator asked her to make this list. She wasn’t asked to share, so I forgot about it, but today she unexpectedly gave it to me anyway.

My favorite entry:

Mrs. M is good at cheering herself up. 

An astute observation, particularly as I sat there using the ocean to indeed cheer myself up, soaking in a few moments of artificially-created tranquility.

This was followed by:

Mrs. M is good at cheering the class up.

So, as easily as I sometimes fall into a funk, at least I’m good at cheering myself (and others) back up. This is probably the best compliment I’ve received in a long time. Thank you dear, bright, sometimes-angry-but-still-forgiving child.

I leave you with 22 crudely-shot seconds of the glorious Oregon Coast in Bandon from this summer. Maybe it will cheer you up too in its quiet simplicity.

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For All the Lives We Almost Lived…

“I am grateful for this life! And yet I miss the alternatives. All sketches wish to be real… We do not actually know it, but we sense it: our life has a sister vessel which plies an entirely different route.” -Tomas Tranströmer, The Blue House

Although I do not regret the life I choose in the least, I like this idea, that our destiny is not fated, that there are many lives we could live, that our choices steer our course… Now, if only there was time to explore all these lives we dream of, instead of having to pick just one… Maybe that is what writing is to me.

Be warned, only click the link below if you’re in a mood for a little melodrama:

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Putting on a Suit to Mean Business

Let me introduce you to the old me. I used to put on suits to accompany my boss to board meetings with important people at banks in downtown San Francisco. I dreaded suit days. Lugging an oversized projector bag in three inch heels from one end of the Bay to the other was not my idea of a good time. Then, of course, there were all the times I donned my suits for job interviews… Let’s just say I’m pleased teaching does not often call for a suit. Today was one of those rare occasions and it felt surprisingly good, surprisingly meaningful.

Day One of Spirit Week: Career Attire

When I heard the all-call for career attire, I considered dressing up for something outside the box, but then I thought about what my students need to see. I decided they needed to see a woman in a suit. Not that they don’t see this from my lovely principal and other administrators, but I felt they needed to see it from me so we could have a discussion about why I used to wear a suit and what it should look like to go to a job interview, (as well as other pertinent scenarios like the reality that heads of businesses and future presidents all wear suits).

Student questions included:

“Is it better to wear heels or flats to an interview?”

“How tall were the buildings you used to go to for meetings?”

“What would happen if you made a mistake in your presentation, would you get fired?”

That one made me laugh, a lot. The first presentation I ever created for the heads of a bank included a mistake where I accidentally left out half of the data analysis. No, I was not fired. Yes, I was embarrassed.

The funny thing in my decision to wear a suit today is that if I were teaching at the private school where I used to sub, I would probably tell the students about the merits of being a teacher or a writer or some other passionate endeavor that contradicts the push to pick a career based on financial security. However, with these kids, my kids, I give them that version of reality everyday when I teach writing, when I talk about why I became a teacher, when I encourage them to follow their dreams.

Today, I wanted to show them another version of myself, one that still exists dormant beneath the surface. I wanted to show them that a woman can put on a suit and mean business.

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Dream Big or Go Home

Every fall, the organization I work for holds a region-wide professional development day. With roots in Silicon Valley and tech start-ups, my charter school group is forward thinking, technology-driven, and business minded. Last year’s theme was the importance of reframing failure as a welcomed opportunity for improvement.

This year, the theme was BHAGs, Big Hairy Audacious Goals. The idea, you have to dream bigger than you can imagine in order to succeed beyond your wildest dreams. You have to think decades, not just years. Then, you have to create an actionable plan to bring these goals to fruition. The more seemingly outlandish, the better.

While I applaud my charter organization for having BHAGs, I decided I needed to also have my own big hairy audacious goals. Usually, I think just one year at a time, maybe five at the most, stretching for what is within reach. Instead, this evening, I pushed myself to imagine the kind of over-the-top success I usually only let linger in my brain for a few minutes before settling on smaller, more seemingly attainable goals.

So, here you go. My BHAGs.

1. Be an internationally published author with readers around the world. I am currently living vicariously through Eowyn Ivey, author of the Snow Child, on her trip around the world to market her book and visit her foreign publishers. To achieve this BHAG, I need to write, write, write, and write some more.

2. At first I wanted to have a blog following of 1,000, but that seemed minuscule in the shadow of a big hairy audacious goal. Instead, I want to establish a following of 10,000. Why not? The more readers of my blog, the more potential readers of my books, and the more likely I can sustain myself as a writer. 10,000 definitely feels big and hairy. Again, I need to write, write, write, and put myself out there.

3. Live or have a vacation property overlooking the ocean. It’s easy to say you want wealth or any number of things that come with it, but I think specificity is important to achieving goals. I want to wake up to the ocean, write with the sound of the waves, do yoga on the beach until I’m a little old lady who can’t do yoga anymore, (aka dead). Again, sounds like I need to write, write, write, because teaching certainly isn’t going to buy that dream.

To write by the sea is the life for me.

My dream.

As writers, I think we’re often discouraged from dreaming big because most of us will never get there. However, as long as your happiness doesn’t depend solely on whether or not you achieve your goals, I disagree with all the disillusioned souls who say it’s too hard, too unlikely. As long as someone out there is doing it, it’s possible. Might as well be me, or you, or better yet, both of us.

Reminds me of my beloved Marianne Williamson quote, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we’re liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

So shine on and be free with me.

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Hopes & Dreams

I remember when I first started substitute teaching at a small private school in East Sacramento six years ago.  Watching all the emerging personalities, I could imagine futures. A balding accountant, a ferocious attorney, a sleek, high-paid consultant. Not only would I see their future professions, but I could see their adult personalities. Most were type A, focused, driven.

As a fresh-faced college graduate, they often complimented my Urban Outfitters apparel, then asked why on earth I would want to be a teacher. They could not possibly understand why I would settle for such low pay to work with children, even though they were children themselves. Clearly, their expectations were shaped by other measures than job satisfaction.

I can’t remember my exact response. Quite honestly, I probably still agreed with them to some degree. I never thought I’d be a teacher, let alone an elementary school teacher. I still thought I had to put my name in lights or make a fortune to be happy. Substitute teaching was my source of income while I lived at home, applied for jobs, auditioned for ridiculously doomed independent films. Travel show host, filmmaker, actress still topped my list. Lawyer had just been scratched on account of the brutal realization I did not want to sign the financial aid papers.

Of course, that was me then. Three years behind a desk making decent money but unhappy left me daydreaming about those same kids. Somewhere along the way, I realized teaching elementary school could be an incredibly rewarding and challenging profession. Which brings me to today, gluing my students’ colorful clouds with their hopes and dreams next to their pictures.

Now I am the leader of a much more eclectic bunch. Many of their dreams are big, creative, out of this world.  Not only that, but many of them want to be teachers. Reading their hopes for the future this afternoon, I could not help but grow teary. In their words, I hear myself. So many future teachers and writers in my room. You know, in addition to other things, like famous dancers and video game makers…

Putting up this wall of hopeful words was the highlight of my week.

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Blogging While Tired (BWT)

I think I have a new rule to add to my guiding principles for blogging…

Blogging while tired may be almost as bad as blogging while drunk.  I feel like I need some sort of little indicator that warns me to just give up and walk away. This week has been exhausting, not sure why, hasn’t been a bad week, but I’ve been beyond tired.  The last post I wrote took me what seemed like hours and I still was not able to really say what I wanted– had to go back and do some little cleaning last night, but even then, was too tired to really tackle it.

Then there have been all the other topics I’ve wanted to write about– a child referring to Mitt Romney as “A bad, bad man,” like a predator or the boogie man, while I tried to keep an unbiased, straight face, the less noticeable beauty of the sunset through the roof and tree-lines of the valley, (as opposed to the majestic unobstructed views shared elsewhere), an acceptance to the kind words/blogging award given over at Talkin’ Shit.  But, even today, my brain is just too tired to really piece together a meaningfully intelligent or humorous post.

So, instead, a decree.

No blogging while tired.  And, when I mean tired, I mean really tired, like when you have to read your sentences five or six times to make sure they make sense, (and then you still sit there scrunching your face at the screen, uncertain if you succeeded, allowing way too much valuable time to disappear into the black hole of the internet).

Too bad I’m already breaking my own principle. Hard to stay away. Must stop rereading sentences even if I can’t tell if they make sense. At least I can say I’ve never blogged while drunk… Although, can’t promise it would be much different.

Too tired to think of a whole post worthy of this picture, but I was struck by the reality that the sunset is only a tiny snippet of the sky where I live down in the valley.  Probably why I don’t notice it most nights… Still gorgeous last night though, the result of thunderstorms and smoke/smog/I really have no idea.

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