oliviaobryon

Last night, as I was making dinner, Alex took our dog for a walk.  When he returned, he announced a skunk sighting next door. This skunk was no baby skunk like the neighbors on the other side spotted.  This was a full-grown, Simon-sized doozy, (at least that is how Alex described it, I’m still skeptical this is possible).

That should have been our warning.  Not to mention the neighbor telling us that once a week or so he sees a skunk walk up the street, through his driveway, and over to the side of our fence.  Like I said, should have.

Fast forward to 1AM.  I’m blissfully asleep, Alex is still awake, a typical Thursday night.

“Babe?”

“Huh?”

“Simon got sprayed again.”

“Shit.”

So, it happened again.  The sneaky monkey realized we only stop him from going outside when he barks first.  He used to bark before he slipped out the door to chase something.  Now he moves like a quiet little ninja.  I’m not going to cause any trouble, just headed out to relieve myself, that’s all, I promise, see, I’m not barking!

Now, I know what you’re thinking.  We need to block the dog door at night.  But, here’s the thing, our cat likes to take the cap off for him pretty much as soon as we put it on.  She’ll just walk by, dismantle it with her freakishly nimble paws and return to whatever it was she was doing inside, not even bothering to go outside.  Alex’s weekend project is a lockable pet door.

Anyway, good thing we finally bought the big bottle of skunk shampoo this week to get rid of his lingering odor from last time, (one dip in the family pool last Sunday and he was back to his stinky self). Forget all that other natural stuff.  Buy the skunk shampoo and use it if you ever need it.  I take back any other advice I gave in previous posts.  Coconut oil will still mask it between baths, but this is the best for diffusing the smell.

Duh. Skunk shampoo. Why in the world did we think all the other crap on the internet would be more effective?

Back to my story.  It’s 1AM, I have 5 hours of sleep left, a tiring week, and here I am, wondering why Alex woke me up to tell me Simon got sprayed by a skunk.  Maybe I’m not the nicest person when awakened in the middle of the night.  You were already awake, great, here is what you need to do: grab gloves, a mask, a towel, remove the carpets from the bathroom, wash him, leave him in there. Have fun!

This time I was not getting my hands dirty.  Already did that.  Too bad I woke up feeling a little mean.  Sorry, Alex, you’re amazing, thanks for taking care of that ridiculously nauseating business (mostly) on your own.

Still, I can’t help but feel proud we now know how to quickly and effectively handle the middle-of-the-night skunk fire drill.  The fallout was much less devastating this time, although our house smells a bit again and he’ll need another bath this weekend. Here’s hoping lightning, or skunks, don’t strike thrice.

This time around he looks, dare I say, comfortable in his post-skunk state. Thanks skunk shampoo…