Category Archives: Teaching

Sep 22 2011
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Teaching

Make it fun, damn it.

Today I had a lot of time to reflect on my teaching at our regional professional development day.

The last couple of days have been challenging.  The students were beginning to go through the routine of the day with fewer reminders from me, so I took a couple of steps back, and as soon as they smelled the freedom, they went wild.  The last two days have been me stepping back into my vigilantly strict role, which has left my classroom a little somber and a little boring, at least to me.  I have a hard time being strict and fun simultaneously.

However, today, I declare no more!  I am determined to be fun and strict simultaneously.  Students that cannot handle it will just sit out of the fun.  Problem solved.  I’ve noticed that some of the best days that we’ve had have been days with little surprises, little quirky joyful moments, little rewards.  One of my favorite moments of this school year so far was when a student taught our whole class, including me, how to shuffle, (see below).

With this recent memory in mind, I have a plan for tomorrow.  In listening to me go on and on about all of the attention seeking behavior in my classroom, my husband suggested that I have a mini-talent show at the end of the day on a semi-regular basis if the students earn it.  I’m so excited to see how it goes.  I’m going to have three different randomly selected judges that write positive adjectives on their white boards after each round instead of scores.  I’m also going to have a theme song (Huskies got talent, yes we do, huskies got talent, we’ll show you!).  And, last, but not least, I’m going to have a game show host.  Now, all I need is the talent!  I know there are dancers, rappers, joke tellers, magicians, and singers all looking for a little extra love in my room.  Here’s to hoping that they come out of their shells and participate tomorrow…

I’m determined to make it fun, damn it.  For their sake and mine.

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Sep 20 2011
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Family, Teaching

Patience is a virtue

Growing up there were a lot of sayings in my family.

This too shall pass.

Life’s not fair.

Patience is a virtue.

I cannot help but wonder how far back these sayings go.  I know that my grandparents used to say them, but did their grandparents say them too?  What about their grandparents?

I also wonder what hardships these sayings originated from, because clearly these are the words of people that have known hardship.

As I go about my day, I often hear these words of supposed wisdom in my head.  And, while I recognize their truths, I recently began to simultaneously question their faults.

This too shall pass screams to me a certain resignation in the present, an omission of the power of action in creating happiness.

Life’s not fair has a similar ring.  Why can’t it be?  Why don’t we rise up and make it fair?  (At least as much as anything is in our control…).

And, finally, patience is a virtue makes me think that maybe patience is overrated.  Patience can be the kind of thing that numbs you into submission as you wait for things to improve.

I definitely see a pattern in my new-found interpretation of these truths.  A certain laissez faire attitude about life that is not in my nature.  I guess that is probably why I had to hear these sayings so many times as a child.  I was frequently displeased with the present, enraged by injustice, and impatient.  But, who is to say that those things are so bad if they make you take action toward something better?

Even so, I doubt that these sayings will disappear with me.  As much as they irk me, they’re also part of me.  I have already found myself saying them to my students and, I’m sure, I’ll also say them to my own children.  They’re easy fixes to complaints, even if they leave the recipient a little unsatisfied.

So, as I feel impatient and frustrated about some of the circumstances in my life, I guess that I should remind myself that patience is a virtue and that this too shall pass.  I just wish that I could find a way to not want it to pass.

Maybe I need some new sayings.

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Sep 15 2011
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Teaching

Sometimes it’s best said by a ten-year-old…

Today I reluctantly taught my class of fourth graders about 9-11.  I was reluctant because I did not know if they would be mature enough to show respect for the content and I did not want to seem like I had an agenda.  I also worried that I would be repeating something that they had already heard over and over throughout their short lives.

To my relief, they were enthralled and respectful.  To my surprise, when I told them about how I watched the day unfold on September 11, 2001, I got some serious goosebumps.  It was so strange to stand in front of 29 people that knew so little about what happened.  Most of them were not even born yet.  Explaining what the day was like for me made me remember how much fear I felt that day.  I never realized how it affected me, even though I heard over and over on the news that it changed my generation.

I tried to keep the content pretty mild and absent of any political undertones one direction or the other.  We read what it was like for a student that went to school down the street from the WTC and watched a short kid-friendly video about the sequence of events that day.  After our discussion and free-write, the kids decorated a small quilt square in memory of what happened.

One student, a boy that speaks English as a second language and sometimes has trouble expressing himself, called me over as he was working.  He was so excited to tell me what September 11 had taught him.

He said that it taught him to enjoy life because you never know what will happen.

Apparently teaching these kids about September 11 was more worthwhile than I expected.

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Sep 08 2011
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Life, Teaching

Something Old

Yesterday after I wrote about my necklace, I remembered how as a kid I used to carry around a good luck charm in my pocket.  In elementary school alone, I went to four different schools, and often had trouble making new friends in the beginning.  Somewhere along the way, I devised a plan to carry the little porcelain chick below in my pocket.  Just like the necklace, it helped to give me both courage and comfort when I felt alone.  Given its small size, I’m amazed that I never lost it!

Now that I teach kids, the chick is a good reminder that sometimes we all need something magical to believe in.  I’ve noticed that many of them carry little toys in their pockets that I confiscate throughout the day.  It never occurred to me that some of these toys might be a source of strength when they need it!  
Tomorrow I will bring my little chick to class and share my story with them.  Maybe it will mean something to some of them. I just hope that I can help make their childhoods a little happier, (even if I still have to temporarily confiscate their good luck charms from time to time!).  
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Aug 26 2011
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Family, Health, Life, Teaching

Sometimes sadness has its own poetry

At around 5:30 this evening I found myself crying, alone, in my classroom.  It was the first time that I’ve ever cried at school, even through all that I survived last year in my program.  I had just sent a couple of emails declining professional development opportunities because of an impending visit from my mom and grandma, who is awaiting the results from the removal of cancerous breast tissue.

Ironically, earlier that day, another teacher on my team lent me a book to read to the students called The Lemonade Club, where a child has Leukemia and her teacher has breast cancer.  Reading the book aloud to the students pushed me to the verge of tears, as I thought of my own family and watched 90% of the students respond with our hand signal for also having a connection.  In quietly sharing our sadness together through this book, I found myself feeling more connected to my students, which oddly compounded my own sadness as I felt some of their pain too.  Somehow, I kept the tears back for the sake of my students.  But, sitting in my classroom, tired, surrounded by work, and reminded of the book as it sat on the ledge of my whiteboard, I let myself cry and it felt surprisingly good.

Crying amidst the brightly colored posters and joyful displays of learning created this strange duality for me of life’s emotions.  It reminded me that in life there must be balance and that maybe conscious sadness is as important to living as conscious happiness.  Oddly, crying left me feeling the most alive that I’ve felt in the past few weeks.  I think sometimes I put too much emphasis on happiness and not enough on just allowing myself to feel what is around me.  I was left with an awareness that sometimes sadness opens our eyes to the fleeting beauty of life as long as we don’t allow ourselves to dwell there indefinitely.

Sitting in this scene of colors and stimuli as I cried this afternoon was a little surreal…   But, on the bright side, my beloved world map carpet finally arrived today after school!

It is hard for me not to look around my classroom and feel the joy on the walls.  So many pieces of myself and my students, smashed together.  I love the huskies that they colored in, each one different and imperfect.  I love that Matilda, our end-of-day book, somehow found its way into the picture, (it migrates).  I love the spelling wheel and the theatrical afternoon game show that it represents…  I could go on, but you get the idea.

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Aug 20 2011
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Teaching

Teacher Brain

I have teacher brain.  I don’t know if all teachers develop teacher brain or just people with obsessive thought patterns, like me.  All that I think about now is teaching and my students.  My poor husband has to listen to me rattle on about their backgrounds, their behaviors, their quotes, my fears, my little victories…  When the dog wakes me up in the middle of the night, I come to from a fog of classroom dreams.  While I’m talking to friends, I find myself droning on with my teaching stories.  I called my dad back after a ten minute conversation about teaching the other night just to tell him one more story.  It consumes me.

I wonder if teacher brain ever goes away or whether you have it as long as you’re teaching.  In a way I like it, because I feel passionate about it and my brain seems to be eagerly processing the challenge of so much information coming from so many different directions.  On the other hand, I think I might drive the people in my life crazy if teaching becomes the only thing I talk about!
Since I’ve admitted that teaching is all that I’m thinking about right now, I’ll share a couple of my favorite moments from the week, (and, to be fair, I guess it’s not ALL that I think about, I have also been planning where we’re going to travel during my breaks, but maybe that is part of teacher brain too?!):
  • Yesterday my students wasted time during art by playing around when the art teacher asked them to clean up their supplies.  When I came to pick them up, they were nowhere near ready to leave, so they ended up wasting about ten minutes of my instruction time and ten minutes of the art teacher’s prep time.  When we got back to class, I had them write letters apologizing to me and the art teacher for wasting learning time by playing around.  The responses were hilarious.  My favorite letter was one where a student tried to explain to us that the Huskies, (that’s what I call them because our class university is UW), just want their freedom because this is a school where they come to learn, not play.  His use of the word freedom made me giggle.  Ironically, the letters made me like my students more because they were generally very endearing and included references to how important learning time is. ❤
  • This week one student told me in the middle of solving a math problem on his white board, “I LOVE THIS SCHOOL!”  (Same student that was trying to explain in his letter that the Huskies just want their freedom…)  I asked him why he loved it and he responded, “I just love it,” while smiling down at his math problem.  I asked him if it’s because he’s good at math and he gave me the biggest smile/nod combo.  Adorable.
  • At afternoon recess, a group of girls called me over away from the other students to show me a cheer they had made up, (or partially stolen from some book about witches turning themselves into eternal youths).  It was pretty hilarious/cute at the same time.  They were so nervous to show me but so proud of themselves when it was over.
  • Last, but not least, our school is participating in an event put on by the 20/30 club where students in need get to go on a mini shopping spree for back-to-school clothes, (thanks to an amazing teacher on my team!).  Five of my students were selected and when I handed out the notices I felt like it was Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and the golden tickets.  I made sure to do it discretely, but in my quiet little conversations with the students that received the spots, I felt like I was handing them winning lotto tickets.  They were so excited!  I could feel some of the financial stress that they already carry at such a young age melt away.  I’ll admit, it made me a little teary.  
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Aug 11 2011
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Teaching

Thank Goodness

I’m afraid to say it but I’m finally starting to feel back to normal again, like I can do this and I like children.  I’m afraid to say it because I do not want to jinx it!

Today I realized that I’m starting to fall in love with my students.  I fell in love with my students last year, which is an odd feeling.  You just suddenly find yourself really caring about them, even when they’re challenging, or maybe especially when they’re challenging.  I felt twinges of it this weekend when I missed them a little, but today I actually realized that I’m beginning to know them and like them.  That sounds odd because you expect people that work with children to like the kids automatically, and even though I do conceptually, it takes me a little time to truly care about them as individuals.  Today reminded me of the feeling that makes me like being a teacher.  Hopefully, the more that I get to know my students, the more I will go home with this feeling.

Yesterday, a student came out of nowhere and wrapped her arms around me and told me that I’m her favorite teacher.  Every teacher knows that you only get to be the favorite teacher while the student is in your class.  But that’s beside the point, if nothing else, at least the universe still finds a way to remind us that what we’re doing matters to someone.

🙂

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Aug 04 2011
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Teaching

Consequences

Day two was much better.  We started using consequences and I’ve decided that they’re a girl’s best friend! What a difference in behavior from day one.  I heard through the grapevine that one parent said, “I like my child’s teacher (me), she’s strict!”  This made me smile.  I think that maybe you have to be a teacher to understand why being called strict can feel good…

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Aug 03 2011
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Teaching

Survival

I survived the first day of school.  I know that sounds extreme, but that is how it feels.  It was a mixture of successes and challenges.  I felt successful in using all of the tools in my belt but I also felt the magnitude of the undertaking.  I know that many people have a great deal of respect for teachers, but I really do not think that most people understand what it takes to teach.  I didn’t until last year, and even then, I don’t think that I’ll fully understand until I’m a few more months in!  Despite the challenges, I’m excited to go back tomorrow and hopeful that if I just work hard at it one day at a time, the magnitude will feel a little less heavy over time.

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Aug 02 2011
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Teaching

First Day of School Eve

Tomorrow is the first day of school!  I’m definitely feeling nervous and excited.  My room is still a work-in-progress, but it’s feeling like a real classroom!  Go team!

PS.  If you love to put together furniture and want to volunteer to help me assemble some bookshelves and storage space this week, let me know!

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Jul 31 2011
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Teaching

Gratitude

Working for a school is a humbling experience in itself, but the last two days have been the most humbling so far.  I arrived to my classroom yesterday to find desks and chairs, that’s it.  School starts Tuesday.  The desks weren’t even the right ones and the chairs were zip tied together in bunches, so the room felt truly empty.  I know a lot of new teachers begin with the same or worse, so this is not a complaint, I just did not expect it to feel so overwhelming to discover that there were not even shelves in my room!

My classroom in the first couple of hours yesterday.  Putting the UW chair in the corner made me feel a little better! 

I think part of my reaction was due to expectations.  I expected most of the furniture I needed to be in the room and started to feel lost knowing where to put everything I purchased and collected over the summer without it.  However, this is the part that is really amazing!  With the help of my lead teacher, other teachers at my school, the principal, and the building manager, there was enough unwanted furniture collected from other parts of the school to make my room functional within hours and the rest was quickly ordered to reach me in the next few weeks.  Moreover, my husband and sister spent the entire day with me, helping to make do with what we had.  So, by the end of the day, my room was far from complete, but so much better thanks to the help of nearly a dozen people!

I am truly humbled by all of the help that I have received to make my classroom ready.  My mom has been collecting books for my classroom library and other odds and ends for over a year.  My dad bought me the coolest maps to hang on my walls.  An old friend from college donated a wonderful used stereo.  Another friend gave up the husky stuffed animal that her husband worked so hard to win at the fair for their kids.  Other friends have promised postcards for my students, including one who has already sent a postcard from Chicago.  Yet another friend is going to spend part of her Sunday in my classroom, helping to put together a bookshelf and get posters up on the wall.  My husband spent both yesterday and today running around campus helping to whip my room into shape, giving up both of his days off.  My sister spent nine hours on Friday in my room and is recruiting friends to come help with her again all-day Monday.  My lead teacher spent half of her classroom prep day helping me to get what I need for my room.  My entire team of fourth/fifth grade teachers has contributed time and classroom items to help me be prepared for Tuesday.  My coach came in and patiently listened while helping to move desks and tape off the spot where our class carpet will be.  Another new teacher, and friend from my program, lent me bins for my students to use since their desks will have no cubbies for the time being. Many others on my school team popped in to help me with materials or kind words of encouragement or simply to offer help…

I know that the list of helping hands in the coming days and years will only grow longer.  This is why I feel so humbled this afternoon.  Even though my to-do list still feels endless and probably always will, I feel like I can take it on because others have so selflessly helped me.  Working at a school is the most humbling experience I’ve ever had.  I feel part of a true community and am really touched to have so many wonderful people in my life willing to help.  Thank you all!

My first morning message for my students, including our first postcard.

The beginnings of the Husky fan club, hope you’ll join too!
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Jul 29 2011
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Life, Teaching

One day at a time…

It seems that I’m back to my “one day at a time” approach to stress management.  I just returned from an awesome retreat with my coworkers in Tahoe and am feeling excited but also a little overwhelmed.  In the beginning of the week I felt the old twinges of anxiety striking when I started thinking about the mountain of work that is in front of me.  That’s when I realized two things. First, it’s kind of my specialty in life to worry about something obsessively and then work hard to do it anyway.  Second, one day at a time helps so much!  Instead of worrying about everything I need to do for the whole school year, (or even next week), all I can do right now is work hard on what needs to get done today and plan for what needs to still happen, (without worrying so much about it).  This is how I survived my program last year and I can already feel it taking the stress off a bit.  So here’s to what I hope will be a very rewarding climb up the mountain, one day at a time!

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